people who call in sick

If you've ever worked or managed in a retail sales environment, you can appreciate that. Because someone (usually me) is picking up that person's opening shift, which means I'm working open to close. I am shooting ugly thoughts their way--since they woke me up at 6:45 AM to tell me they weren't coming in and I had to haul myself out of bed and come up here.

Evil. Pure evil.

ID

One thing I will never understand is people who balk at showing ID for writing checks, using credit cards, getting in their safe deposit box...I mean, they act like I just walked up to them on the street and said, "hey dude, can I see your driver's license?" When they actually came to me to transact some sort of business and then act like I'm inconveniencing them when I ask to verify who they are before I run their credit card for $500. If I didn't check the fucking ID and the transaction wasn't legitimate, then they'd be raising hell about that. I get pissed when people DON'T want to see my ID when I'm paying for something in some way other than cash money. And who thinks they should get in a safe box with just their key and charm? Do you want your kids to find your damned safe box key and come in and wipe out all of your jewelry, because people do know how to forge a signature you know. They could get your key, forge your signature, and if I'm not looking at your ID, I've just let them in your box.

What in the hell is wrong with people?

Jessica Simpson

Good Lord, she's a normal sized person! She likes to drink margaritas and eat chicken wings! The world is ending! Her DD breasts now look proportioned to the rest of her body! Stop the press!

Give it a fucking rest people...who cares?

plastic bra straps

My husband and I went to see the musical "Tommy" at The Plaza theater. You know, the one with The Who soundtrack, and it was fabulous! The only ugly thing there was this girl who had on a fab dress, which had spaghetti straps, and underneath--one of those tacky bras with plastic straps. I do not understand this. Who do they think they're fooling? Do they really think other people can't see the straps? Are they too poor to invest in a strapless bra? And don't tell me some people can't wear strapless bras. Because one, I'm a D, and this girl was much smaller chested than me, and if I can find a good strapless bra that works, so can she. And two, if you are one of those DDD or E women (not artificially enhanced), then you probably don't need to be wearing something that needs a strapless bra. I'm not saying in every case, but in most, items that don't support your bust aren't all that flattering. Whoever invented those stupid bras should be tied to the stake with the guy who invented panty hose, and they should both be lit ablaze.

doctor's office

I started going to a new doctor. They sent me a ton of paperwork in the mail to fill out before I arrived. No problem. In the packet there was also a scathing letter about people who show up late for their appointment. It wasn't like a little mention that you sometimes see, but a whole entire letter about it. So, I'm thinking these people must be extremely time conscious. Again, no problem. I am always five minutes early for everything.

However, I arrive on time, with all of my paperwork filled out, and I sit. And then I sit, and I sit, and I sit. After about 20 minutes, I come up and ask what the hold up is. They tell me the doctor is with a patient and still has one patient left to see before me. I tell them that if they expect me to be on time, then they should also be on time. They looked at me as if I were the devil. After 30 minutes, I told them if they didn't get me in, I was leaving. They asked if I would like to reschedule. I said, "why, so I can come and sit here for another 30 minutes?"

This shit annoys me. Why don't you just put up a sign that says, "We don't really care about your time. We only care about our time. So, please come in. Expect to wait thirty minutes, and then you can pay us for essentially being inconsiderate of you." It's unfortunate doctors don't treat you more like a customer than like a patient. Makes me mad.

piece of fucking shit computer

I type and then, when I go to post my blog, the piece of shit says it can't find the site. Of course, it does this all the time, so you think I'd get some common sense and save the shit I type, but I don't.

I don't know if you've ever seen anyone physically assault a computer, but one day, I tell you...one day...

anorexia

My doctor told me I am overweight. I am 5'8, and I weigh 145 pounds. I could see where I could stand to lose about 5 pounds, but he told me he wants me to weigh 125!!! ONE TWENTY FIVE. I mean, come on--do you know how sickly I would look if I weighed 125? I am a chesty girl, and just bigger all around, so I cannot imagine weighing 20 pounds less. My face would look like it had plastic surgery. Forget the fact that I haven't weighed 125 since I was in 6th grade. I weighed 144 all through high school.

Crazy doctors. That's what pushes people over the edge. Makes me mad.