Friday, May 23, 2008

Panty Hose

I will wear a good pair of tights. I put dark ones on in the winter with cute boots, and they keep me warm, and I love them. I can throw them in the washing machine, and wear them a good ten or twelve times and they are still in great condition. I love thick ones and patterned ones and bright colored ones.

But what I hate are panty hose. I cannot stress enough how strongly I feel the word hate deep down in my soul every time I think about these hideous things. They are uncomfortable, they are ugly, and worst of all, you can probably wear the pair one time before you get a run in them and then have to throw them away.

Men complain about ties, about how they are uncomfortable and hot. How about having to put a tight pair of nylon made crotch huggers on and wearing them around in 105 degree heat? You think your neck is hot, let's talk about how great you'd feel with your crotch all hot and sweaty. And at least if you pay $40 for a tie, you can wear it until the end of all time. I pay $4 for a pair of hose I get to wear once before I have to throw them in the trash. Talk about a waste of money.

And did I mention they are UGLY? If they looked really great, I could maybe understand. But they are hideous looking, and people make all kinds of fashion blunders with them. Black hose with white shoes. Toe seamed hose with open toed shoes. Hose with sandals. They are just something else to confuse the fashionably inept.

They should be removed from all shelves and burned. Just my opinion.

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