Monday, February 4, 2008

dance dance revolution


I like to go dancing. I like to get several of my lady friends, even a fellow friend or two, and go out and dance. I grew up dancing, and even now, at the ripe old age of 32, I still like to break it down every once in awhile.

But no matter where you go, you always run the risk of being assaulted by some drunk guy who wants to come up behind you and attempt the most stellar of dance moves called "rub my groin area on _____(you can fill in the blank here with butt or leg or whatever). Now I realize that there are some girls out there who are attracted to this sort of fellah. When a guy approaches them in this manner, it really gets their juices flowing. They are used to this sort of pick up line, and they proceed to turn around and in a similar drunken manner rub their groin on the guy's leg, groin, whatever.

However, I assure you, I do not look like one of those girls. No matter how thick his beer goggles are, there is no way any one man would look at me and think, "now there's a girl who wants me to dance up on her." I dance by myself. I take up a lot of room. I do spins and clap my hands and I wave them in the air in true "adult raver" type fashion. There is absolutely nothing about my dancing style that would cause someone to think I would want to do the "dirty dance move" with them.

But even so, I still get those guys who come up and not saying a word, grab me from behind and start pushing their penis/balls into my back. I will never understand it. When did it become okay to not even ask a girl if she would like to dance? When did it become okay to just assume you are the hottest guy at the club and every girl there would like to feel your member pushed up on her? I must have fallen out of the loop somewhere.

It makes me mad that I can't even go out and have a good time dancing without having some asshole trying to rub his penis on me from behind.

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